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Parents: Trapped by Our Fears
Read More: Parents: Trapped by Our FearsThe real question for all of us is: What invites us to respond in drastic ways to our childrens’ misbehavior and mistakes? My hunch is that is fear. Many of the parents I work with are afraid when their children lie, steal, are mean to their siblings, swear, wear sexually provocative clothing, investigate pornography online, start cutting, text or sext at all hours of day or night, smoke pot…etc.
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What is your Request?
Read More: What is your Request?When I first started teaching parenting classes, I had a couple who came up with the idea of asking their daughters, “What is your request?” They were parents of preschoolers and I’m sure their days were filled with hearing what their children didn’t want to do, or didn’t want to eat. It was such a simple solution and once again, I, as the parent educator, got to learn something from the parents in my class. I brought this new parenting tool home with me and found that it was a wonderful way to communicate with my two children.
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Peaceful Parenting in a Fast-Paced World
Read More: Peaceful Parenting in a Fast-Paced WorldPeace is a community affair. Sure we can create a semblance of peace by building big walls around ourselves– blocking the wind from our little corners of the lake, but it isn’t real peace. Peace is about the agreements we make with each other, about how we fasten ourselves together and become whole. It is about how we learn to live with each other so that we can appreciate the moments of being in between the moments of doing. Is there some internal work that helps this process? Yes. And as parents we need to teach our children skills to…
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What Kind of Bystander are You?
Read More: What Kind of Bystander are You?Imagine that your daughter and her friends are sitting hanging out in the family room – talking and texting and you hear, “Oh that is so gay!” Do you feel uncomfortable but remain silent because you don’t want to embarrass your daughter? Do you wait and talk about it in private afterwards? What do you do when you hear Uncle Alfred make a derogatory comment about women or children or people of a different race or sexual orientation? Do you just say to yourself or your children, “That’s Alfred, he is a little off color?” What do you think that…
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An Ode to the Wild Things
Read More: An Ode to the Wild ThingsOur children are born into an adult world where many experiences are new, confusing and often scary. They are working hard at taming the wild things. As parents, we can help our children make sense of the frightening things in the larger world around us.
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Self-regulation Matters
Read More: Self-regulation MattersBut she KNOWS better! Why does she act this way? How many times have you thought this, said it or listened to another parent share their frustration this way? And when you reflect on it, how many times have you noticed, reflecting back on one of your not-so-wonderful parenting moments that indeed YOU knew better? Join the club.
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Non-stop Negotiation Getting You Down?
Read More: Non-stop Negotiation Getting You Down?As the parent it doesn’t always feel so great when all of your positions get shaved away by your budding courtroom lawyer. It is exhausting. Setting limits firmly and still honoring the dignity of your child isn’t really hard, but it takes practice.
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Small Steps into the New Year
Read More: Small Steps into the New YearA lot is written this time of year about what we “resolve” to do for the future. Goals are great but it can be really discouraging when, despite good intentions, they are not met.
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Time Out? Time In?
Read More: Time Out? Time In?The idea that a grumpy child is going to go sit somewhere and calmly think about what they “should have done” is quite preposterous. Did you? I didn’t. When I was sent to my room I spent the whole time thinking about how unfair the situation was or plotting how I was either going to make that particular parent “pay.” Just guessing, but I don’t think that was what my parents were aiming for.
Help us celebrate! May 2024 is our one-year anniversary of becoming BELONG Partners!
